Self Care: Forgiveness

by Water On Thirsty Land | Oct 29, 2019 | Bible Studies, Deep Bible Studies, Self Care Series

The past few weeks have seen an amazing emphasis on self-care as we have focused on how to best manage material possessions, spiritual paralysis, and even how to allow God to free us in the midst of feeling spiritually stopped up leading to worry and anxiety. In this post, we will wrap up this series by looking at the value of forgiveness.

As people, many of us are prone to hold grudges against others who have wronged us. In many cases, we can find ourselves longing for justice to be served and can place ourselves in a mental state in which we replay the events over and over while secretly wishing a large object would fall out of the sky and right onto the head of a person that has caused us pain. We do all of this while questioning why God is permitting such terrible things to happen to his children as if we are entitled to better treatment simply because we believe in Jesus.

Even as I sit writing this, I find myself thinking back on my life and running through the list of people that took advantage of me, bullied me, or betrayed me. This list is not really long but the pain that they have caused sticks with me to this day. It can deeply affect my actions and behaviors towards people if I’m not careful and I don’t even recognize it’s happening until such a time as I realize that what I’ve done has harmed a standing relationship unintentionally. It is truly a humbling thought to realize that we are all susceptible to these issues and for that reason we feel the need to share some thoughts regarding a biblical approach to forgiveness.

Forgiveness is Directly Tied to Our Ability to Love

36 One of the Pharisees asked him to eat with him, and he went into the Pharisee's house and reclined at table. 37 And behold, a woman of the city, who was a sinner, when she learned that he was reclining at table in the Pharisee's house, brought an alabaster flask of ointment, 38 and standing behind him at his feet, weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears and wiped them with the hair of her head and kissed his feet and anointed them with the ointment. 39 Now when the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what sort of woman this is who is touching him, for she is a sinner.” 40 And Jesus answering said to him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.” And he answered, “Say it, Teacher.” 41 “A certain moneylender had two debtors. One owed five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. 42 When they could not pay, he cancelled the debt of both. Now which of them will love him more?” 43 Simon answered, “The one, I suppose, for whom he cancelled the larger debt.” And he said to him, “You have judged rightly.” 44 Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. 45 You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. 46 You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. 47 Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.” 48 And he said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.” 49 Then those who were at table with him began to say among[a] themselves, “Who is this, who even forgives sins?” 50 And he said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”

Luke 7:36-50

It is difficult to imagine that our willingness and ability to forgive is tied so closely to our capacity for love but in this story from Luke’s gospel we are shown just that. When Jesus is dining with some of the Pharisees a woman of ill repute comes to him with tears and perfume to anoint his feet and dry them with her hair. In comparison to the actions of the Pharisees that night, he sets her behaviors above theirs and in forgiving her sins provides the statement that “he who is forgiven little loves little.”

This woman knows her failures and the sin in her life and recognizes the salvation that was available through Jesus which led her to him in the first place. She was able to look at her life and recognize how much she had been forgiven for and as a result expressed such great love towards her savior that offered freedom from her guilt and shame. This was a point deeply missed by the Pharisees as they were so focused on what sins she had committed and not on the guilt and shame of knowing and being constantly reminded of how fallen she was.

Forgiveness is for our Own Healing and Relief

21 “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’22 But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother[a] will be liable to judgment; whoever insults[b] his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell[c] of fire.23 So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you,24 leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.25 Come to terms quickly with your accuser while you are going with him to court, lest your accuser hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the guard, and you be put in prison.26 Truly, I say to you, you will never get out until you have paid the last penny.

Matthew 5:21-26

We should be cautious here since we never want to make spirituality solely about us but in this case, our ability to forgive others is directly connected to true freedom. The passage listed above is from Jesus’ sermon on the mount and the lesson for this point comes specifically in the context of his discussion on where the seeds of hate and murder are planted. When people wrong us, a seed of bitterness and hate is planted whether we realize it or not. Specifically in this verse, Jesus calls those who have been wronged to reconcile with the aggressor of that pain. This is a backwards way of thinking even today. When we are wronged, we almost demand that they come and make things right with us but in this verse, Jesus says those who are at the altar and realize there is a dispute, should go and reconcile.

When we are unwilling to give up transgressions against us, it binds us to those who have caused us pain. This means we are giving head and heart space to people that have no right to be there. Even in the Lord’s prayer Jesus counsels his disciples by saying “forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Our willingness to forgive others is an act of healing in and of itself. This does not mean that the other person will apologize but by doing our part and forgiving them we begin the healing and choose not to use that as an excuse for negative behaviors in the past. The last thing God wants us to do is be bound to another because of pain that He has promised to heal.

We Have No Right to Seek Revenge

17 Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all.18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.19 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it[a] to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”20 To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.”

Romans 12:17-20

Finally, we must remember that when it comes to human relationships, we have no authority to repay wrongdoing with another wrongdoing. We must remove the old adage that says “two wrongs make a right.” This is worldly thinking and something that should be purged from our actions. As Paul writes to the church of Rome, there is never a call to repay evil for evil rather, believers should “live at peace with everyone.” That is a tall order to meet but one that we should strive towards.

While it is easy to get stuck and desire repayment for wrongs, we also have to hope for a restoration to God in these matters who is the only one justified judge. Our goal, as people, is to live in such a way that glorifies God so that others may come to know Him and be saved. When we live in a way that avoids retaliation and runs to forgiveness we live a life that pleases and honors the God we serve.

Self Care: Unclog Your Spirit

by Water On Thirsty Land | Oct 22, 2019 | Bible Studies, Deep Bible Studies, Self Care Series

I think we can all agree that videogames are super fun, and most of us would say they are an important part of our lives. I think I can also say with much confidence that our jobs, finances, families, and friends also fall into the “important bucket”. Growing up my family never had much money, we certainly didn’t have much family time between all the screaming and fighting, I can count the number of healthy friendships I’ve had on one hand, and was extremely absorbed into my job before becoming a stay-at-home-mom because I was so concerned about having more money all the time. So each of those things definitely holds significant weight in my life, and it can be extremely difficult to place these things as less important than each other or anything else. I truly feel that is a struggle most, if not all, of us have to some degree.

So where should each of these things fall along the importance scale? The answer is actually pretty simple.

In Mark 9, Jesus took Peter, James and John up to a mountain and this is where Jesus temporarily stripped off His humanity and let His deity shine bright. He proved His divine identity in that moment, and while doing so had Elijah and Moses there speaking with Him in the presence of Peter, James and John. Peter then took it upon himself to interrupt Jesus and offer to help Him by creating shelters for Jesus, Elijah, and Moses - notably, he placed all 3 of them as equals in this offer to help. So in this incredible moment where God let His light shine upon the faces of these earthly men, Peter failed to recognize the importance of the moment, the importance of Jesus, and also had the grand idea that he could help Jesus. It doesn’t stop there, though. After Peter had totally killed the moment and made a fool of himself, God scolded Peter.

'Then a cloud appeared and covered them, and a voice came from the cloud: “This is my Son, whom I love. Listen to him!” ' Mark 9:7

What is God really saying here?

“Jesus is more important than Elijah and Moses, whom you just tried to make equals. Don’t try to help him, just be quiet and listen to him!”

You ever find yourself trying to “help” God? Or argue with Him about what should be done? Do you ever find yourself placing “things” of this world above Jesus?

Yeh, me too.

When we try to help God or “reason” with Him that our way is better, we are placing ourselves above God. When we prioritize money, friends, family, fame, work, or anything else above Christ, we are failing to make Him Lord of our lives. This in turn starts to clog our spirits as we grow more out of tune with Him, and further away from the work God wants to do in our lives.

Whoever gives heed to instruction prospers, and blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord.

Proverbs 16:20

We are called to something greater than to be content with earthly rewards. As much as we enjoy our video games, value family time and friends, work hard to have more money and buy more “things”, these things should all fall under the Lordship of Christ. It is okay to place value on the things we love and enjoy, but what we so often find ourselves doing is placing Jesus in one bucket and everything else in another, separating them. What we need to do is bring every part of our lives under the Lordship of Christ. Let Him rule over every aspect of our lives. When Jesus is the Lord of our lives, we make Him higher than anything else. He becomes our highest influencer, the most important, highest ranked Saviour and Ruler of everything we have, do and say. We are not called to just include Him in the important things; He needs to be placed above them because when He is not above it all, we risk destroying it all - just as Peter ruined the moment where Jesus stripped off his humanity for a tiny sneak peek at His true divine identity.

If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed with life, stressed out and not sure what to do, take a look under your umbrella and see where you have placed your “important things”. Are they under Christ, or separated? Reach out to Him to help you get refocused and realigned, and unclog your spirit from our human perception of “important”.

'And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. '

Colossians 3:17

Self Care: Unstuck

by Water On Thirsty Land | Oct 15, 2019 | Bible Studies, Deep Bible Studies, Self Care Series

As I lay awake, completely restless and unable to sleep, I began to pray and jump onto my Bible app to catch up on some of my reading plans. I had been feeling pretty anxious for a solid week and just when I had started to feel a bit better my mind was flooded with anxiety evoking thoughts.

I'd missed a family members funeral due to distance and time, spent far too much time in a crowded room of people I was uncomfortable around, rough mom week, stressful finances, and bad news and tough requests all week long. The list can go on, but I know we've all had one of "those weeks" at some point; the kind that leaves you feeling utterly drained and vulnerable, and that makes you want to isolate yourself so you can melt into a puddle under the covers of your warm, safe bed and not come out till the stress is gone.

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?

Matthew 6:25

If you're anything like me you sometimes go through periods where you just can't seem to keep your eyes on Jesus and what He provides. It's far too easy to see the things that feel like they're going wrong, and then we miss the opportunity to learn something, and to see God work in our lives.

Sometimes I need a reminder that life is so much more than what feels wrong or difficult. There is so much more than what I see in the tunnel vision if anxiety. When we get sucked into that hypnotizing tunnel vision we get stuck in a spiritual rut like walking in quicksand. You just want to get free, but you forget that in order to get out of the sinking sand you have to be slow, steady, and patient. Panicking is what makes you sink into the depths of the sand, suffocating into darkness.

When we lose our focus on Jesus, we panic and sink, and wind up stuck. When we keep our focus on Him we realize He's been throwing us a rope this whole time and it's right there at our fingertips ready to be grabbed onto so He can pull us out and free us from the sinking pit of despair.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6:19‭-‬21

I think we can all admit money is in itself a stressful topic. Sometimes it just feels like there's never enough. As a single mom I struggled to afford what was needed, constantly sacrificing to ensure my kiddo had what she needed, working longer, harder hours hoping to make a bit more money, at some points working up to three jobs. I was drowning in worry over money. After a long time of this I started to feel God put on my heart to start tithing. I was so anxious over this and it felt like the finances weren't getting any easier, but as soon as I gave in and out of faith began to give back to God I saw my whole world change around me and my entire faith blossomed more than I'd ever known possible. Stepping out in faith and trusting God with my finances helped me get unstuck from a constant pit of financial worry.

When I focus on the money (or lack thereof), get worked up about it, spend too much, or stress about being able to buy what I need, I miss out on God constantly showing up to remind me that He will provide for me. And boy does He show up! Ever since I began giving back to God my faith has grown and God has blessed me in ways I never imagined would happen in my life. Keeping my eyes, and my heart, focused on Christ will keep the anxiety of finances at bay. He's got this!

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

Matthew 5:9

You ever just feel like when it rains it pours? My ability to be kind and gracious has been tried and tested more times than I can track, and I don't think there are ever enough reminders to be the peacemaker, to be the one who stays calm, who shares a voice of reason. I definitely don't always succeed. I mean, I am human, and God knows very well that these reminders throughout every day are so necessary for all of us. I discover time and again that when I find myself complaining about my circumstances, point to the speck in someone else's eye, and just all-around finding myself depressed, upset, or on edge it can always be traced back to me not spending as much time with God. Whenever I find myself becoming negative, whiny or hostile I realize it's because I'm not living as Christ. I'm not being the peacemaker in my world. Once I zero back in on His plan and strive to be more like Christ, I feel myself pulling loose from the quicksand again and start to breathe easier. Maybe the situation doesn't improve right away, but I know from experience that my perspective and attitude has the power to grow my faith or sink it. It takes intentional focus every moment of the day, but it is worth every moment.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

Matthew 5:4

God knows very well when we are hurting, and He hurts with us as a Father mourns with His hurting children. God has an incredible way of comforting us in our sadness. When we choose to look to Him for comfort we are able to find an impossible peace to help us tackle the pain. We must recognize that God is in control. We are not. Lifting our worries up to a God who cares allows us to be freed of the hurt and over time we can heal and learn from the hurt. We can use every pain as a tool to learn and grow our faith, and grow deeper in relationship with Christ.

Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it.

Luke 11:28

I think the biggest challenge we face is to obey the word of God, but I can honestly say that when we strive to do our best to live as Christ and obey His instruction we can then live our best life. Life will continue to have ups are downs, joys and sorrows, pleasures and pain, but we get to learn more about our Heavenly Father and be blessed with His peace, grace, forgiveness and every other blessing He has in store for us as we strive to honor Him with obedience. We can get unstuck from the spiritual ruts we find ourselves in by heeding His warnings and listening for His instruction. Life doesn't feel so bad when we are aligned with our God who loves us more than we could ever comprehend.